We’ve all heard the term before, and you may have even encountered one at some point. And while combining the words “bride” and “Godzilla” was probably a joke initially, there is nothing funny about a bride-to-be that takes on that Bridezilla persona.
Quite often, it’s ‘Momzilla,’ ‘Friendzilla,’ or the dreaded soon-to-be ‘Mother-In-Lawzilla’ that is responsible for ramping up the stress level and forcing you to transform. In some cases, it may even be all three!
But unless you plan to run away with your beloved and exchange vows in a one-on-one scenario, other people are going to be part of the process. Here are five tips to help you deal with challenging people and keep your wedding about you.
This is your day, and if you want to keep it all about you, you will need to set crystal clear boundaries and expectations. It won’t take long after you’ve made your wedding announcement to figure out who the difficult ones are going to be.
At this point, you need to communicate clearly about what you expect and what you will not tolerate during the process. You can still be loving, but your message needs to be firm, and it needs to be precise. This day is yours, and that’s that.
That being said, it’s never a good idea to get stressed out over every little thing. Keep in mind that these people are trying to help, and you can decide which aspects to push back on and which to let go of. If it isn’t going to affect the overall feel or dynamic of the day, it’s probably ok to relent.
Before they reach in and take over certain aspects of your wedding planning, take the time to assign specific roles to each person that’s close to you. That may be your Mom, new Mother-in-law, bridesmaids, maid of honor, sisters, etc. Make your task list as early as possible, then give each person encouragement as they complete it. This would be an excellent opportunity to outsource some of those tasks you aren’t keen on completing yourself.
The reality of the situation is that some people will be challenging to manage during this process. When you start arguing with this reality and get into a “this should be like this” type of mentality, you’re setting yourself up for a stressful experience. Set boundaries, be firm, assign tasks, but also accept that everyone is different and try to appreciate them for who they are.
Sometimes, the problem with relenting a little is that you end up conceding a lot and then resenting the people who caused you to have a wedding that wasn’t part of your original vision.
The truth is, no wedding is going to go off entirely without a hiccup or two, so flexibility is a must. But it’s also essential to keep your vision in mind so you can manage all the people and their expectations and still have the wedding of your dreams.